Body language, gestures, non-verbal communication – no matter what term is used, it is often used as a way to understand what another person is really thinking, regardless of what they are saying.
But, is everything we think we know about body language accurate? There are some myths that abound about body language that simply aren’t true.
The Eyes of a Liar
Most people will say that someone cannot look another person in the eyes and lie, but that is a myth. In fact, research conducted by Paul Ekman, a pioneer in the study of facial expressions, proves the exact opposite. Ekman’s research found that pathological liars have no problem staring someone in the eyes and lying.
And what about people who avoid eye contact? Are they being deceptive? Ekman pointed out that nervousness can make people dart their eyes and shyness can cause them to avoid eye contact completely, even when telling the truth. In some cultures, avoiding eye contact, especially in younger people, is encouraged.
Eye Contact is Good
Going along with the myth that liars cannot look a person in the eye, many believe that more eye contact is better. However, directing a fixated stare at another usually makes the other person uncomfortable. Eye contact that lasts a few seconds is best for showing attention and conveying sincerity. Any eye contact longer than that may be perceived by the other person as flirtation or intimidation.
Hands Behind the Back
Some people mistake a person putting his or her hands behind their back when standing as a sign of power. Known as the “Prince Charles” stance, this type of body language is actually not seen by others as a sign of strength but as that of someone who is not trustworthy. People like to see a person’s hands in order to know what they are doing with them. To gain a person’s trust, a person should keep their hands front and centre.
Touching Shows Dominance
Another body language misconception is that people in power show their dominance over others by touching them. Research has shown the opposite. It is often the person of lower status that touches first. Research has also proven that women are more likely to initiate touch than men.
A Smile Means Happiness
We often associate smiles with happiness but again, that is a myth. People may smile for many reasons including when they are fearful, in contempt, feeling dejected, and unhappy.
Babies begin to smile within hours after birth, but their social smile, one in which they fix their gaze upon another person’s face, doesn’t happen until they are between five weeks and four months old. While smiles can have a powerful effect on others, it doesn’t always mean the one smiling is happy.
Fast-Talkers Can’t Be Trusted
Many people have been confronted with a fast-talking salesman who has tried to trick them into buying something. But, fast-talk doesn’t necessarily mean someone is trying to bamboozle you.
While people may be suspicious of fast-talkers, they should actually be more suspicious of those that talk slower. Speakers who take too many pauses or have long pauses peppered with “ah” and “uh” may be trying to making up details of the story he or she wants to tell as they go along.
Research has proven that some people have misconceptions about body language and what it actually means. Remember to take all things into account – culture, social dynamics, personal habits – and use as much information as possible when judging another based solely on his or her body language.
domingo, 28 de novembro de 2010
Interpreting Body Language
The study of body language looks at both specific body language movements as well as how both the sender and the receiver interpret those movements. Interpreting body language is critical to fully understanding communication but interpretation is tremendously subjective depending on situation, culture, and other circumstances.
Different Situations, Different Interpretations
Interpretations of a single body language message may vary greatly depending on both the situation and the person doing the interpreting. Whether you are at work, at home, at a restaurant, in a car, etc., any given non-verbal message will have multiple, often wildly different, meanings.
Let’s look at one simple action – a hug between two people – and how its meaning varies in different situations;
* At work – Work is a relatively formal situation so a hug between two people usually appears a bit out of place. When it occurs, it may be a sign of support, friendship, flirtation, or even dominance. It can also meaning a person is nervous, extroverted, or simply has a very large boundary of personal space.
* At a party – A party is a relatively informal situation so a hug between two people usually appears much more natural and appropriate. When it occurs, it may be a sign of greeting, happiness, affection, flirtation, or departure from the location.
* On a date – A date can range from ‘getting to know you’ to spending time within an intimate relationship. Because of this, when a hug occurs it may be a sign of greeting, flirtation, support, affection, closeness, couple status, a desire for increased intimacy, or even a desire to avoid the greater intimacy of a kiss.
* Between two men – A hug between two men is a relatively rare occurrence in some situations and quite common in other situations. When it occurs, it may be a sign of masculinity, friendship, happiness, affection, intimacy, awkwardness, informality, or confidence.
* Between two women – A hug between two women is much more common and likely to happen in a greater number of situations. When it occurs, it may be a sign of friendship, emotion, surprise, happiness, sadness, support, comfort, welcome, warmth, and even introduction.
* Between a man and a woman – A hug between a man and a woman often happens in informal and intimate situations, but may also happen in situations that are more formal. When it occurs, it may be a sign of attraction, affection, intimacy, greeting, flirtation, friendship, familiarity, dominance, status, comfort, or even control.
These examples just scratch the surface of variations. Think back through your own life experiences and you’ll probably recognise many of these examples. What’s more, you’ll probably come up with many, many more examples unique to you.
Different Cultures, Different Interpretations
Some of the greatest differences in body language interpretation occur between different cultures. These variations can range from what is considered appropriate in formal versus informal situations, to professional versus personal situations, to specific symbolic meanings.
For instance, in cultures where body language is typically quite expressive (Italy, Latin America, Spain) a hug or a kiss on the cheek is often interpreted as nothing more than a common greeting. However, in cultures where body language is more reserved (Japan, the Middle East, some parts of Europe) the same hug or kiss would often be interpreted as inappropriate, too familiar, rude, or even threatening.
Another example is the common body language of holding hands. In the United States, it is interpreted as a sign of intimacy and couple status between two people, or protection and guidance between an adult and a child. Take a walk in Japan or Saudi Arabia, though, and holding hands is interpreted as a sign of friendship between two women but a sign of promiscuity and even vulgarity between a man and a woman.
Gestures are a form of body language that can literally have entirely opposite meanings in different cultures. If you hold up two fingers in a ‘v’ sign it means victory or peace in the United States when the palm is facing outward, but in the UK it means ‘up yours’ when the palm is facing inward.
Another gesture with vastly different interpretations is called the ring gesture. It is formed by touching the tips of your thumb and index finger to form a circle and extending the rest of your fingers outward. In France, it means you think someone is worthless, but in Japan, it means you’re referring to money.
Why do Differences in Interpretation Matter?
Differences in interpretation of body language matter a great deal because they are integral to interpretation and understanding communication in general. When sender and receiver interpret non-verbal cues differently, the potential for misunderstanding, insult, and other problems grows tremendously.
Different Situations, Different Interpretations
Interpretations of a single body language message may vary greatly depending on both the situation and the person doing the interpreting. Whether you are at work, at home, at a restaurant, in a car, etc., any given non-verbal message will have multiple, often wildly different, meanings.
Let’s look at one simple action – a hug between two people – and how its meaning varies in different situations;
* At work – Work is a relatively formal situation so a hug between two people usually appears a bit out of place. When it occurs, it may be a sign of support, friendship, flirtation, or even dominance. It can also meaning a person is nervous, extroverted, or simply has a very large boundary of personal space.
* At a party – A party is a relatively informal situation so a hug between two people usually appears much more natural and appropriate. When it occurs, it may be a sign of greeting, happiness, affection, flirtation, or departure from the location.
* On a date – A date can range from ‘getting to know you’ to spending time within an intimate relationship. Because of this, when a hug occurs it may be a sign of greeting, flirtation, support, affection, closeness, couple status, a desire for increased intimacy, or even a desire to avoid the greater intimacy of a kiss.
* Between two men – A hug between two men is a relatively rare occurrence in some situations and quite common in other situations. When it occurs, it may be a sign of masculinity, friendship, happiness, affection, intimacy, awkwardness, informality, or confidence.
* Between two women – A hug between two women is much more common and likely to happen in a greater number of situations. When it occurs, it may be a sign of friendship, emotion, surprise, happiness, sadness, support, comfort, welcome, warmth, and even introduction.
* Between a man and a woman – A hug between a man and a woman often happens in informal and intimate situations, but may also happen in situations that are more formal. When it occurs, it may be a sign of attraction, affection, intimacy, greeting, flirtation, friendship, familiarity, dominance, status, comfort, or even control.
These examples just scratch the surface of variations. Think back through your own life experiences and you’ll probably recognise many of these examples. What’s more, you’ll probably come up with many, many more examples unique to you.
Different Cultures, Different Interpretations
Some of the greatest differences in body language interpretation occur between different cultures. These variations can range from what is considered appropriate in formal versus informal situations, to professional versus personal situations, to specific symbolic meanings.
For instance, in cultures where body language is typically quite expressive (Italy, Latin America, Spain) a hug or a kiss on the cheek is often interpreted as nothing more than a common greeting. However, in cultures where body language is more reserved (Japan, the Middle East, some parts of Europe) the same hug or kiss would often be interpreted as inappropriate, too familiar, rude, or even threatening.
Another example is the common body language of holding hands. In the United States, it is interpreted as a sign of intimacy and couple status between two people, or protection and guidance between an adult and a child. Take a walk in Japan or Saudi Arabia, though, and holding hands is interpreted as a sign of friendship between two women but a sign of promiscuity and even vulgarity between a man and a woman.
Gestures are a form of body language that can literally have entirely opposite meanings in different cultures. If you hold up two fingers in a ‘v’ sign it means victory or peace in the United States when the palm is facing outward, but in the UK it means ‘up yours’ when the palm is facing inward.
Another gesture with vastly different interpretations is called the ring gesture. It is formed by touching the tips of your thumb and index finger to form a circle and extending the rest of your fingers outward. In France, it means you think someone is worthless, but in Japan, it means you’re referring to money.
Why do Differences in Interpretation Matter?
Differences in interpretation of body language matter a great deal because they are integral to interpretation and understanding communication in general. When sender and receiver interpret non-verbal cues differently, the potential for misunderstanding, insult, and other problems grows tremendously.
How Prevalent is Non Verbal Behaviour?
Many of us say what we feel by opening our mouths and letting the words come out, sometimes without considering what it is we actually want to say. Likewise we can use our bodies to give off signals, make gestures and add emotion or depth to a thought or feeling.
Non Verbal Behaviour
Each and every one of us during the course of every day uses non verbal behaviour as a means of embellishing what we say. Sometimes we do it knowingly and sometimes we do it as a matter of instinct; however we choose to do it though our bodies, eyes, hands and arms give away perhaps more than we would like.
The Eyes
Sometimes the eyes say more than our mouths – we can look at someone with a look that gives away more depth of emotion than the words we speak. We can look at an individual with a stare that looks as though we are angry or we can look at someone lovingly.
Our eyes truly are the windows to our souls and when we look at others they can tell instantly whether or not we are happy, sad, angry or shy.
The Hands
Many of us use our hands to embellish the words we say; we can do this by waving our hands around if we are excited or angry or if we want to tell a story with more emotion we can use our hands to make signs and gestures that tell others more about the depth of emotion felt at the time.
Some people keep their hands in their pockets and they do this because they are expressive when it comes to hand gestures. Others keep their hands in their pockets because they fidget uncomfortably with their fingers if they tell a lie or are nervous.
There are others who bite their fingernails when nervous or in the process of telling a lie and sometimes the hands, in conjunction with the eyes, can tell an entirely different story.
Reading Non Verbal Behaviour
There is no better place to observe non verbal behaviour than in a nightclub or at a dating event. Individuals – both male and female – will observe each other from afar and can gesture to each other using their hands, their eyes or indeed their legs as a means of indicating their liking of a person.
It is said that women cross their legs from one side to the other to show their liking of a man who may be watching them; this is not meant in a sexual way but is simply meant to indicate they have a visual attraction at least.
Again as we have said there is no better place to read non-verbal behaviour then in a nightclub – noisy, dimly lit, non verbal behaviour is sometimes the only way in which to communicate in these places.
The manner in way people dance is also an indication of how they feel about another person; dancing close to them indicates liking them and if the couple are together then dancing closely indicates they want to be close to each other and enjoy being close to each other. Whilst couples who dance a distance apart are often only doing so to keep up appearances for the benefit of those around them.
Reading the Signs
It is important to note that as well as we think we might know a person their body language can tell us so much more about them especially when it comes to their moods. However it is also important to note that some individuals are particularly good at disguising their moods and their body language.
For most though there will be at least one tell-tale sign that gives their mood away and it is always worth watching for this sign but not too closely as sometimes the slightest movement can be misread.
Non Verbal Behaviour
Each and every one of us during the course of every day uses non verbal behaviour as a means of embellishing what we say. Sometimes we do it knowingly and sometimes we do it as a matter of instinct; however we choose to do it though our bodies, eyes, hands and arms give away perhaps more than we would like.
The Eyes
Sometimes the eyes say more than our mouths – we can look at someone with a look that gives away more depth of emotion than the words we speak. We can look at an individual with a stare that looks as though we are angry or we can look at someone lovingly.
Our eyes truly are the windows to our souls and when we look at others they can tell instantly whether or not we are happy, sad, angry or shy.
The Hands
Many of us use our hands to embellish the words we say; we can do this by waving our hands around if we are excited or angry or if we want to tell a story with more emotion we can use our hands to make signs and gestures that tell others more about the depth of emotion felt at the time.
Some people keep their hands in their pockets and they do this because they are expressive when it comes to hand gestures. Others keep their hands in their pockets because they fidget uncomfortably with their fingers if they tell a lie or are nervous.
There are others who bite their fingernails when nervous or in the process of telling a lie and sometimes the hands, in conjunction with the eyes, can tell an entirely different story.
Reading Non Verbal Behaviour
There is no better place to observe non verbal behaviour than in a nightclub or at a dating event. Individuals – both male and female – will observe each other from afar and can gesture to each other using their hands, their eyes or indeed their legs as a means of indicating their liking of a person.
It is said that women cross their legs from one side to the other to show their liking of a man who may be watching them; this is not meant in a sexual way but is simply meant to indicate they have a visual attraction at least.
Again as we have said there is no better place to read non-verbal behaviour then in a nightclub – noisy, dimly lit, non verbal behaviour is sometimes the only way in which to communicate in these places.
The manner in way people dance is also an indication of how they feel about another person; dancing close to them indicates liking them and if the couple are together then dancing closely indicates they want to be close to each other and enjoy being close to each other. Whilst couples who dance a distance apart are often only doing so to keep up appearances for the benefit of those around them.
Reading the Signs
It is important to note that as well as we think we might know a person their body language can tell us so much more about them especially when it comes to their moods. However it is also important to note that some individuals are particularly good at disguising their moods and their body language.
For most though there will be at least one tell-tale sign that gives their mood away and it is always worth watching for this sign but not too closely as sometimes the slightest movement can be misread.
How Body Language Influences Daily Life
Body language is part of every aspect of your daily life. It affects your interactions with other people your observations of other people, and even your interactions and observations with yourself. Many people don’t realize just how powerful body language is when it comes to self-esteem, self-confidence, and just generally feeling good about yourself.
How Does Your Body Language Affect You?
Maybe your mother told you to smile, even if you don’t feel like it, because it can help you and the people around you feel a bit better. This old piece of advice has very real roots in reality, because your own body language has a powerful effect on you as well as on the people around you.
Let’s go back to the smile for a moment. Try it for yourself right now; smile for a few seconds and notice how you feel. You might feel a bit silly, of course, but chances are you also feel at least an inkling of more positive feelings. Counsellors and mental health professionals often use this technique to help people with depression literally lift their own spirits, encouraging those people to make a conscious effort to smile as much as possible.
Body position and posture is also an important factor in your self-esteem and self-confidence. You can try this for yourself, too. Stand up and walk across the room with your shoulders slumped, your head tilted down, and your feet dragging just a bit. How does it feel? Now walk back across the room with your shoulders square and back, your head held up, and your feet moving briskly. How does it feel? What differences did you notice?
Applying Your Body Language to Your Daily Life
Okay, so your own body language does have an impact on your daily life. What advantage is there to knowing this? Well, for one thing, it gives you a greater amount of control over your own emotions and attitude. Now, of course a smile alone is not going to correct a great deal of sadness, fear, and the like, but when used consistently and in combination with other non-verbal self cues, it can help you start to feel better.
Another part of applying body language to your daily life is your appearance. What happens when you just throw on a pair of jeans and an old t-shirt? How do you feel? Now think about when you get dressed up in nice clothes with your hair neat and makeup (if applicable) looking good? How do you feel? Chances are the simple action of putting on nice clothes and a bit of primping leaves you feeling confident, happy, and attractive.
Think about all of the different ways your own body language gives your own brain some important non-verbal clues. Sometimes it is really hard to force yourself to ‘perk up’ and change your body language. It may even feel as if you’re ‘lying’ to yourself a little bit. Despite these feelings, rest assured that there is nothing deceitful about using non-verbal actions to build up your own confidence and self-esteem. Just the opposite, in fact, because knowing how and when to do this is a powerful tool in your arsenal of dealing with the challenges and opportunities of daily life.
How Does Your Body Language Affect You?
Maybe your mother told you to smile, even if you don’t feel like it, because it can help you and the people around you feel a bit better. This old piece of advice has very real roots in reality, because your own body language has a powerful effect on you as well as on the people around you.
Let’s go back to the smile for a moment. Try it for yourself right now; smile for a few seconds and notice how you feel. You might feel a bit silly, of course, but chances are you also feel at least an inkling of more positive feelings. Counsellors and mental health professionals often use this technique to help people with depression literally lift their own spirits, encouraging those people to make a conscious effort to smile as much as possible.
Body position and posture is also an important factor in your self-esteem and self-confidence. You can try this for yourself, too. Stand up and walk across the room with your shoulders slumped, your head tilted down, and your feet dragging just a bit. How does it feel? Now walk back across the room with your shoulders square and back, your head held up, and your feet moving briskly. How does it feel? What differences did you notice?
Applying Your Body Language to Your Daily Life
Okay, so your own body language does have an impact on your daily life. What advantage is there to knowing this? Well, for one thing, it gives you a greater amount of control over your own emotions and attitude. Now, of course a smile alone is not going to correct a great deal of sadness, fear, and the like, but when used consistently and in combination with other non-verbal self cues, it can help you start to feel better.
Another part of applying body language to your daily life is your appearance. What happens when you just throw on a pair of jeans and an old t-shirt? How do you feel? Now think about when you get dressed up in nice clothes with your hair neat and makeup (if applicable) looking good? How do you feel? Chances are the simple action of putting on nice clothes and a bit of primping leaves you feeling confident, happy, and attractive.
Think about all of the different ways your own body language gives your own brain some important non-verbal clues. Sometimes it is really hard to force yourself to ‘perk up’ and change your body language. It may even feel as if you’re ‘lying’ to yourself a little bit. Despite these feelings, rest assured that there is nothing deceitful about using non-verbal actions to build up your own confidence and self-esteem. Just the opposite, in fact, because knowing how and when to do this is a powerful tool in your arsenal of dealing with the challenges and opportunities of daily life.
Body Language Across Cultures
It used to be that the study of body language across cultures was an academic pursuit interesting but not really vital in the course of daily living. Now, however, with our globalised economy and greater exposure to diverse cultures, understanding differences in body language can have a huge impact on many aspects of work, business, and personal life.
Examples of Cultural Differences
Cultural differences in body language may show up in a wide variety of ways, such as the amount of physical touch, the conversational distance between people, the interactions between same genders, the interactions between different genders, and the like.
For example, some cultures are very expressive when it comes to physical touch. Think about Italy where a big hug and kiss on each cheek is considered a common and acceptable greeting, and then compare it to Japan where a proper greeting consists of a respectful bow and no touch at all.
Personal space and comfort distances are very personal, of course, but they also are influenced by cultural expectations. In South America, for instance, personal space and comfort distances tend to be quite small. People stand very close to each other to talk, even when they don’t know each other very well. Go to the United States, though, and personal space becomes much larger; people are not as comfortable when others stand close to them, especially if they are not very well acquainted.
Cultural differences in body language extend to gender interactions as well. Many cultures still view men as dominant and of higher status than women, and their body language expectations reflect this view. Women may be expected to avert their eyes in the presence of a man, or walk a few steps behind him. Western cultures, in general, have gradually revised their gender expectations to allow men and women to share more equal status in terms of acceptable body language.
Practical Applications of Cultural Differences
Anybody who travels to different countries, whether for business or pleasure, must have a good understanding of body language expectations. In the business world, the wrong body language messages can skewer a deal quite fast. In the world of general travel, the wrong body language messages can lead to hostile and even dangerous situations.
For instance, in the Middle East a male businessperson has much more leeway in terms of where and how he walks than a female does, not to mention much different levels of access to local business opportunities. In fact, very few women do business in the Middle East because the cultural aversion to interacting with women is just too much to overcome.
If you are planning a vacation to other countries, you should always pay attention to the body language expectations. For instance, if you get lost in Japan you’re much more likely to get help from a local citizen if you know to show respectful body language and follow local customs of bowing and avoiding touch.
The bottom line when it comes to cultural differences is that knowledge is the key. If you go to a different culture it only makes sense to learn about their expectations and adhere to those expectations during your time there. It shows respect for the culture, respect for the people, and may even keep you from inadvertently breaking the law in some very conservative countries. When you understand and apply appropriate body language behaviours, your entire experience is likely to be more pleasant and successful.
Examples of Cultural Differences
Cultural differences in body language may show up in a wide variety of ways, such as the amount of physical touch, the conversational distance between people, the interactions between same genders, the interactions between different genders, and the like.
For example, some cultures are very expressive when it comes to physical touch. Think about Italy where a big hug and kiss on each cheek is considered a common and acceptable greeting, and then compare it to Japan where a proper greeting consists of a respectful bow and no touch at all.
Personal space and comfort distances are very personal, of course, but they also are influenced by cultural expectations. In South America, for instance, personal space and comfort distances tend to be quite small. People stand very close to each other to talk, even when they don’t know each other very well. Go to the United States, though, and personal space becomes much larger; people are not as comfortable when others stand close to them, especially if they are not very well acquainted.
Cultural differences in body language extend to gender interactions as well. Many cultures still view men as dominant and of higher status than women, and their body language expectations reflect this view. Women may be expected to avert their eyes in the presence of a man, or walk a few steps behind him. Western cultures, in general, have gradually revised their gender expectations to allow men and women to share more equal status in terms of acceptable body language.
Practical Applications of Cultural Differences
Anybody who travels to different countries, whether for business or pleasure, must have a good understanding of body language expectations. In the business world, the wrong body language messages can skewer a deal quite fast. In the world of general travel, the wrong body language messages can lead to hostile and even dangerous situations.
For instance, in the Middle East a male businessperson has much more leeway in terms of where and how he walks than a female does, not to mention much different levels of access to local business opportunities. In fact, very few women do business in the Middle East because the cultural aversion to interacting with women is just too much to overcome.
If you are planning a vacation to other countries, you should always pay attention to the body language expectations. For instance, if you get lost in Japan you’re much more likely to get help from a local citizen if you know to show respectful body language and follow local customs of bowing and avoiding touch.
The bottom line when it comes to cultural differences is that knowledge is the key. If you go to a different culture it only makes sense to learn about their expectations and adhere to those expectations during your time there. It shows respect for the culture, respect for the people, and may even keep you from inadvertently breaking the law in some very conservative countries. When you understand and apply appropriate body language behaviours, your entire experience is likely to be more pleasant and successful.
How to Recognise Negative Body Language
The first thing to remember about body language is that it says what you can’t or don’t want to say verbally. Body language is an extension of a human being’s ability to communicate and as such it can be used as a means of passing over positive vibes or negative vibes almost as clearly as if we were to say something in a happy or sad tone of voice. This form of nonverbal communication is very important as to how a person is portrayed.
What is Negative Body Language?
As we have briefly touched upon negative body language is any kind of movement of the body, head, eyes, any part of the visible anatomy that alludes to us as individuals being unhappy or displeased by something or someone.
Negative body language often manifests itself in one of the following physical ways:
* Shoulders drawn back
* Persistent eye contact (staring)
* Arms crossed over the chest
* Sweating
* Hands clenched to make fists
* Swaying back and forth
* Grinding teeth
All of the aforementioned physical displays can be attributed to negative body language and are often seen during a host of different scenarios. Indeed many of them you may be a regular user of yourself depending on the nature of (a) your mood and (b) the circumstances surrounding that mood.
How Mood Affects Negative Body Language
If you are happy then your body will feel relaxed, your muscles will be loose and your eyes will convey a sense of contentment. This however is not the case if you are in a bad mood.
We categorise a bad mood as being annoyed or upset or unhappy about something or indeed someone and although we can hide this mood by trying to be jolly and chatting with people in the usual way our bodies and their movements, stances and postures can unmask even the best performance.
If you are in a less than happy mood it is likely you will pace around, stand up a lot of the time, tap your fingers or do any of the things we mentioned earlier on. Our minds, although trying to focus our attention away from what is bothering us, cannot control all of our body’s movements and so some of them slip through and are visible.
What Causes Negative Body Language?
As we have already mentioned mood has a lot to do with negative body language but there are other factors which have a bearing on it as well. Some of the factors contributing to negative body language are as follows:
* Boredom
* Frustration
* Nervousness
* Being suspicious of someone in our company
* Staking a claim on our territory
All of these can cause a display of negative body language and again sometimes the mind is unable to stop this display from manifesting itself physically or even know its happening.
We each of us know how our partners and other family members behave and it is likely that they know how we behave when we find ourselves in any of the aforementioned sets of circumstances so it is a wise idea to ask them as to how they see you behave in those circumstances. You may find the results surprising.
What is Negative Body Language?
As we have briefly touched upon negative body language is any kind of movement of the body, head, eyes, any part of the visible anatomy that alludes to us as individuals being unhappy or displeased by something or someone.
Negative body language often manifests itself in one of the following physical ways:
* Shoulders drawn back
* Persistent eye contact (staring)
* Arms crossed over the chest
* Sweating
* Hands clenched to make fists
* Swaying back and forth
* Grinding teeth
All of the aforementioned physical displays can be attributed to negative body language and are often seen during a host of different scenarios. Indeed many of them you may be a regular user of yourself depending on the nature of (a) your mood and (b) the circumstances surrounding that mood.
How Mood Affects Negative Body Language
If you are happy then your body will feel relaxed, your muscles will be loose and your eyes will convey a sense of contentment. This however is not the case if you are in a bad mood.
We categorise a bad mood as being annoyed or upset or unhappy about something or indeed someone and although we can hide this mood by trying to be jolly and chatting with people in the usual way our bodies and their movements, stances and postures can unmask even the best performance.
If you are in a less than happy mood it is likely you will pace around, stand up a lot of the time, tap your fingers or do any of the things we mentioned earlier on. Our minds, although trying to focus our attention away from what is bothering us, cannot control all of our body’s movements and so some of them slip through and are visible.
What Causes Negative Body Language?
As we have already mentioned mood has a lot to do with negative body language but there are other factors which have a bearing on it as well. Some of the factors contributing to negative body language are as follows:
* Boredom
* Frustration
* Nervousness
* Being suspicious of someone in our company
* Staking a claim on our territory
All of these can cause a display of negative body language and again sometimes the mind is unable to stop this display from manifesting itself physically or even know its happening.
We each of us know how our partners and other family members behave and it is likely that they know how we behave when we find ourselves in any of the aforementioned sets of circumstances so it is a wise idea to ask them as to how they see you behave in those circumstances. You may find the results surprising.
Communication - What Percentage is Body Language?
Typically what percentage of communication is made up from the body language of the speakers? I've heard 55%.
A.
The percentage that you have quoted is basically correct, but isn’t always relevant to all modes of communication.
The figure 55% comes from some research that Albert Mehrabian undertook in 1971, the results of which are still often quoted today. Mehrabian basically came to the conclusion that communication, on a face-to-face basis, is thought to consist of three separate elements:
* Words (what is actually said)
* Tone of voice (how we say the words)
* Body Language
All three of these elements can be conveyed at the same time to express an overall message. Often, the tone of voice and body language are combined to become the most powerful form of communication. However, body language – which forms a large part of non-verbal communication – is often used on its own, and is thought to be one of the most ‘telling’ modes of communication. Through his research Mehrabian also surmised that proportionally, the three elements were not of equal importance. He claimed that in face-to-face communication, the majority of what is put across is portrayed through non verbal communication:
* Words (the literal meaning) account for 7% of the overall message
* Tone of voice accounts for 38% of the overall message
* Body Language accounts for 55% of the overall message
Therefore, through face-to-face communication, the nonverbal communication becomes the most powerful mode of communication when conveying feelings or attitudes – e.g. “I like this”, “I don’t like this”. It is much more likely, therefore, to be the primary indicator.
For instance, imagine that a man and a woman are having a blind date. The man asks the woman if she’s enjoying herself. The woman isn’t enjoying herself at all, but wants to be polite, so she says “yes, I’m having a really nice time”. The literal meaning of the words she uses conveys that she is enjoying herself. The tone of voice she uses in conjunction with the words may, however, betray the words she’s speaking. Her closed, awkward body language may also express that she’s not enjoying herself. So the two non-verbal communication elements may give away the fact that she isn’t having a very good time, despite saying she is.
However, it’s worth noting that Mehrabian has since noted “…Unless a communicator is talking about their feelings or attitudes, these equations are not applicable”. In essence, the 7% figure can be misleading as it could imply that the words we say are of relatively little importance. This isn’t the case - the above equation is only really relevant when the words we are saying are at odds with the body language or tone of voice we’re using.
A.
The percentage that you have quoted is basically correct, but isn’t always relevant to all modes of communication.
The figure 55% comes from some research that Albert Mehrabian undertook in 1971, the results of which are still often quoted today. Mehrabian basically came to the conclusion that communication, on a face-to-face basis, is thought to consist of three separate elements:
* Words (what is actually said)
* Tone of voice (how we say the words)
* Body Language
All three of these elements can be conveyed at the same time to express an overall message. Often, the tone of voice and body language are combined to become the most powerful form of communication. However, body language – which forms a large part of non-verbal communication – is often used on its own, and is thought to be one of the most ‘telling’ modes of communication. Through his research Mehrabian also surmised that proportionally, the three elements were not of equal importance. He claimed that in face-to-face communication, the majority of what is put across is portrayed through non verbal communication:
* Words (the literal meaning) account for 7% of the overall message
* Tone of voice accounts for 38% of the overall message
* Body Language accounts for 55% of the overall message
Therefore, through face-to-face communication, the nonverbal communication becomes the most powerful mode of communication when conveying feelings or attitudes – e.g. “I like this”, “I don’t like this”. It is much more likely, therefore, to be the primary indicator.
For instance, imagine that a man and a woman are having a blind date. The man asks the woman if she’s enjoying herself. The woman isn’t enjoying herself at all, but wants to be polite, so she says “yes, I’m having a really nice time”. The literal meaning of the words she uses conveys that she is enjoying herself. The tone of voice she uses in conjunction with the words may, however, betray the words she’s speaking. Her closed, awkward body language may also express that she’s not enjoying herself. So the two non-verbal communication elements may give away the fact that she isn’t having a very good time, despite saying she is.
However, it’s worth noting that Mehrabian has since noted “…Unless a communicator is talking about their feelings or attitudes, these equations are not applicable”. In essence, the 7% figure can be misleading as it could imply that the words we say are of relatively little importance. This isn’t the case - the above equation is only really relevant when the words we are saying are at odds with the body language or tone of voice we’re using.
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